Certain sets of words in the English language tend to confuse writers. I have found the following to be among them:
ME, MYSELF, AND I
The above phrase—me, myself, and I—is one we used to say when I was a child: There was no one there but me, myself, and I or I was all alone with only me, myself, and I.
Cute, maybe, but hardly correct English.
Correct: There was no one there but me.
Correct: I was all alone with only myself for company.
The word I is a nominative pronoun and can be used as the subject of a sentence as in the second example above. The word me is an objective pronoun and can serve as the object of a preposition as in the first example above. The word myself is a reflexive pronoun that refers to the pronoun I in the second example above.
One of the mistakes in grammatical usage that many people make is the misuse of reflexive pronouns:
Incorrect: Rebecca and myself both bought swimsuits yesterday.
ANALYSIS: Reflexive pronouns (myself, yourself, himself, herself, itself, ourselves, yourselves, themselves) usually refer to another noun or pronoun in the same sentence and are used to indicate or intensify that noun or pronoun. In the above incorrect example, the only person mentioned in the sentence to whom the pronoun myself could possibly refer is Rebecca, and that is clearly not the case. Although the above usage may be acceptable in casual conversation or in a fictional character’s speech, in more formal speech or written work it would be preferable to stick with the idea that a reflexive pronoun should be exactly that and refer to some other noun or pronoun previously mentioned.
Correct: Rebecca and I both bought swimsuits yesterday.
If you are determined to use the reflexive pronoun myself in such a sentence, you might write:
Correct: I myself bought two swimsuits yesterday, but Rebecca bought only one.
Here are a few more examples of proper and improper uses of reflexive pronouns:
Incorrect: Dad used to let both my brother and myself ride on the tractor.
Correct: Dad used to let both my brother and me ride on the tractor.
Correct: Dad himself let both my brother and me ride on the tractor. (himself = Dad)
Correct: My brother liked to ride the tractor with me, but I preferred to ride it by myself. (myself = I)
Correct: My brother once hurt himself badly when he fell off the tractor. (himself = brother)
Correct: My little sister was very proud of herself the first time she rode the tractor alone. (herself = sister)
Correct: Many people pride themselves on being able to ride a horse, but as far as I’m concerned, that tractor itself is just as difficult to ride as a bucking bronco. (themselves = people) (itself = tractor)
NOTE: Officially speaking, there are no such words as hisself or theirselves. Save these for characters’ dialect in your novels if you must use them at all.
Other pronoun-use mistakes often made include the use of an objective pronoun (such as him, her, or me) when the nominative case (such as for the subject of the sentence) is called for and the use of a nominative pronoun (such as he, she, or I) when the objective case (such as for the direct object or the object of a preposition) is called for:
Incorrect: Him and I are best friends.
Correct: He and I are best friends. (subject of the sentence)
Incorrect: Martha’s only friends are Sally and me.
Helpful Hint: An easy way to figure out what pronoun to use in a predicate nominative situation such as in the sentence above is to switch the subject and the predicate nominative and see what pronoun should be used for the subject of the sentence; that is the pronoun you should use in the predicate nominative: Sally and I are Martha’s only friends.
Correct: Martha’s only friends are Sally and I. (predicate nominative following the intransitive being verb are)
Incorrect: Farmer Jones paid Joe and I to pick apples last fall.
Correct: Farmer Jones paid Joe and me to pick apples last fall. (direct object)
Incorrect: My mother gave my sister and I each a new dress before we started school.
Correct: My mother gave my sister and me each a new dress before we started school. (indirect object)
Incorrect: When my uncle died, he left his house to my sister and I.
Correct: When my uncle died, he left his house to my sister and me. (object of the preposition to)
Order is also important when first person pronouns (such as I, me, we, us) are used in conjunction with other nouns or pronouns.
Incorrect: Me and him are the best chess players in the school.
Correct: He and I are the best chess players in the school.
In the incorrect example above, not only are the two pronouns that serve as the compound subject of the sentence in the wrong case (objective instead of nominative), but they are also in the wrong order (the “speaker” should always place himself after any other people mentioned).
Incorrect: The coach selected both me and Katie to be on the track team.
Correct: The coach selected both Katie and me to be on the track team.
In the above incorrect example, the pronoun me is in the correct case (objective because me serves as part of the compound direct object), but it is still incorrect English because the “speaker” (represented by the pronoun me) put herself first in front of Katie. It is considered rude when speaking or writing of yourself to put yourself in front of anyone else in a compound subject, object, or predicate nominative situation. When two or more people are mentioned, the pronoun representing you the speaker/writer must come not first, not in the middle, but dead last.
Incorrect: My mom and dad and Uncle Dave were all really happy when my brother Jim and I and Cousin Sarah all won blue ribbons at the 4-H exhibition.
Correct: My mom and dad and Uncle Dave were all really happy when my brother Jim and Cousin Sarah and I all won blue ribbons at the 4-H exhibition.
NOTE: The word between, when used as a preposition, takes the objective case:
Incorrect: Just between you and I….
Correct: Just between you and me….
Correct: Between you, me, and the lamppost….
The lamppost is not a person, so it’s okay to put it last. Grammatically speaking, however, the above correct example is not altogether correct inasmuch as the preposition between is preferably used with only two objects; for three or more objects, the preposition among would be more appropriate.
These types of mistakes are more often made in speech—even formal speech, I regret to say—than they are in published written works, but we often write in the same way that we speak, so it is worthwhile to remember these distinctions when writing.
Helpful Hint: These pronoun mistakes happen most often when the misused pronoun is part of a compound subject or object—in other words, when the misused pronoun is used in conjunction with one or more other nouns or pronouns. A good way to avoid making such mistakes is to eliminate those other nouns and pronouns in your mind so that only the one pronoun remains and then determine which pronoun would be correct in that instance. Would you really say, “Me likes to play baseball” or “Aunt Joan takes good care of I”? I didn’t think so.
Correct: Life would be much easier with just me, but would I really want it to be just I?
ANALYSIS: Life would be much easier with just me [object of the preposition with], but would I [subject of the second independent clause of a compound sentence] really want it to be just I [predicate nominative following the intransitive verb to be]?
REMEMBER: The intransitive being verbs, such as be, is, are, was, and were, do not take an object; use nominative case pronouns such as I, he, she and we following these verbs.
© 2016 Ann Henry. All Rights Reserved.